A Senior's Survival Guide to Graduation

And the realization of graduation hit me like a brick.  Don't get me wrong, like, I knew it was coming.  But seriously, where has the time gone? It seems like just yesterday I was moving my life into M-53 (RED HALL, WHOOP!) and dreading the year ahead of me after seeing I had to live with some girl named Kate Baker who couldn't even climb to the top bunk (no joke).  Don't worry, she later took care of the issue by having the beds debunked, completely changing the feng shui of the entire room.  Talk about a rough start.

But that rough start has turned into a beautiful journey, one in which I never could have predicted.  I have met and befriended some amazing people, held some fun and interesting jobs and internships, traveled the world, and learned so much academically and about myself as a person. Sounds great, right? Which is why I think I freaked. Well that, and this whole "real world" "job" ordeal.  A big thank you to those seniors who already have their post-graduation jobs set in stone. You truly made it easy for me to rationalize the extent of my panic.  

But after my freak-out and a viewing of "Tangled" to calm me down, I was able to rationally come up with a few guidelines to help me remain calm and survive the rest of my semester with minimal worry (hopefully).

1. Apply EVERYWHERE
I've set a rule for myself that I will apply for at least 5 jobs at week.  If I do 5 at minimum per week, that ends up being 80 jobs over the course of the semester.  And out of 80 jobs, I HAVE to be hired for one of them, right? Well, I hope so.  If not, I might go into an extreme depression which will lead to my admittance into a mental ward. Maybe this rule isn't as great as I originally thought?

2. Network, Network, Network
I go to a school where they teach "it's not what you know, it's who you know," for crying out loud.  I've had so many internship opportunities over the past few years and I've formed some amazing relationships.  This is where the phrase "never burn your bridges" comes back to haunt you (if you have).  Time to start sending out those e-mails and, well, quite frankly, sucking up.  By the time I've reconnected with everyone I'm going to be so high-wired after all the cups of coffee I've drank.  

3. Don't Settle
I'm pretty much applying for any job I THINK I'd be interested.  So as many jobs as I'll be applying for, I guarantee I'll walk into some interviews and be like "you want...what?"  I'm an advocate of doing what makes you happy.  I don't want to wake up every morning thinking "ugh, time to go to work."  I want to be excited.  Who cares if you turn down the offer? If it's not right, it's not right.  And hey, if nothing else, it serves as a confidence booster that you are desirable for other employers!  How does the saying go? "If you find a job you love, you'll never have to work a day in your life."

4. Consider Grad School
Ha. Yea, right.

5. Don't Stress
My one day of freak-out was more than enough.  One of my biggest fears with this semester ending is moving away from the people I've met here.  I have connected with them in a way a never connected with the majority of my high school peers.  They are genuine, fun-loving, down-to-earth, whole-hearted people.  And I worry I won't be able to find that wherever I go.  By stressing out and over-analyzing everything I'm going to miss out on spending some of my last days with such a great bunch that when I look back on my last semester I'm going to realize how big of a fool I've been.  So far everything has worked out for me so I can only assume things will continue to play out the way they are meant to be!

A Northerner's Guide to Southern Lingo

It seems as Americans we're always enamored by the exotic characteristics of foreigners, especially Europeans. The thing that gets us most? Their accent. Don't even pretend like you haven't met a Brit and fallen in love with their accent. The way they say "the lou" and the various terms they have for our everyday words always gives us great delight. We're amused so easily by the lingual differences.

Well boy, do I have great news for you. No longer do you have to wait for someone to travel over from Europe to bask and enjoy in the differences of speech.  Oh, no!  While they may not be quite as "exotic," our southern counterparts sure do have a language of their own. I have spent a lot of time in the south over the past few months and always joked with my friends that I was going to have to start a dictionary of southern terms and phrases. Below you will find a few phrases that may bring extreme confusion when heard for the first time.

1. Britches: An informal type of trouser
   Example: "Claytus, pull up those damn britches of yours."
   Northern Synonym: Pants, jeans

2. Whale: In a good or satisfactory way; in good health
   Example: " Whale, butter my butt and call me a biscuit."
   Northern Synonym: Well

3. Tin: The number that comes after nine
   Example: "Eight, Nine, Tin. Ready or not here I come!"
   Northern Synonym: Ten

4. Buggy: A vehicle with four wheels, typically used to carry your groceries around the store
   Example: "Gary Lee, when we get to Walmart, grab us a buggy!"
   Northern Synonym: Shopping cart, cart

5. Lawd: The big man up in Heaven
   Example: "Oh my lawwwwwd."
   Northern Synonym: Lord

6. Tater: The part of your body that rests atop your neck
   Example:  "This hat won't fit on top my tater!"

The hat on Gary's head would be
considered a "toboggan".

   Northern Synonym: Head

7. Toboggan:  A winter hat, especially one that resembles a Russian winter hat
   Example: "I found the warmest toboggan today at Walmart!"
   Northern Synonym: Winter hat


8. Fixin': To direct one's efforts; concentrate; to prepare
   Example: "I'm fixin' to bushhawg the field."
   Northern Synonym: "Getting ready to"

9. Jaeatyet: A phrase questioning whether one has eaten a meal
   Example: "Jaeatyet?"
   Northern Synonym: "Did you eat yet?"

10. "Bless his heart": A phrase that cancels out anything negative you say about someone
   Example: "Bless her heart, but she the ugliest broad I ever saw."
   Northern Synonym: None

11. "Whale ain't that nice": A sarcastic phrase essentially meaning "Who gives a shit?"
   Northern Synonym: Cool story, bro

**Special thanks to all my friends from the south who made me feel at home this past summer and made me want to keep coming back! I have learned so much from you (more than just linguistically) and look forward to continuous visits.**